The "Don'ts" in My Opinion

This post is something that I've thought about blogging about for awhile, but went back and forth with it. It has nothing to do with T1D, fitness or being gluten free. It is about the world of online dating. Can be a touchy subject, but it is 2014 and now the internet is a part of everyday life for the majority of people so it is nothing unheard of. Plus I am sure a lot of people will be able to relate to some of my feelings and experiences.

Now these are just my own opinions and in no way is it meant to offend anyone. Maybe it will give a different perspective?

I have been a part of the online dating world for awhile now. Dating in the real world is hard enough and I have come to see that the online world is no better. However I feel that when one makes their online dating debut they should see it as an opportunity to sell themselves. After all isn't that why you go on there and depending on the site, make an investment to keep a profile?

With that said I wanted to share some of my biggest online dating pet peeves.

1. Spelling Errors

We are in the year 2014. We have spell check, apps for spelling, friends to ask and last but not least... the dictionary. On the other hand auto correct has gotten many of us in some awkward situations before. I get that, but there is no excuse for not proofreading. Double check, triple check, quadruple check if you have to! Your online bio is a persons first impression of you! If you cannot compose a decent paragraph or two and know the difference between there, their and they're we are not a good match.

2. Picture Selection

This is the first thing a fellow online dater sees when checking out a profile, so make it your best (and normal)! If all of your pictures are "selfies" with a kissy face, do you really think I am going to take you seriously? I am sorry, but I am not looking for a teenage girl.

Not even kidding.

Or if 9 out of your 10 photos are from the year 2008 I am going to be a little skeptical. Are you trying to get me to date your 2008 self? We are not going back in time. Find a friend, go outside, and get a nice normal shot (or at least try to). Less is more.

The majority of your pictures include other people. Whose dating profile is this? If I have to play a game of "Where's Waldo?" it's on to the next.

Oh and please, don't post multiple pictures of your cat/dog.


3. Sending an Email

This is where that lesson you learned in elementary school about how to write a friendly letter comes into play. Keep it short, but well thought out. "Hey" is not going to cut it. What are we back on AIM circa 2003?

Show that you took two minutes of your time to read the persons profile. Ask a question about the person, state something specific that you noticed you have in common. If you can't compose a coherent, proofread email what do you think a first impression of you will be?

4. Exchanging Numbers

After exchanging a few emails you realize whether or not this person is worth meeting. If they have passed all of the above criterion it is time to meet. This crucial step can really make it or break it. The texting world has had a negative impact on this generation to be able to communicate face to face. Do not rely on the texting before you actually meet. I don't know you yet. I highly doubt you care about my day just yet or want to see what I am up to. If you do that is very nice, but I doubt it. Pick up the phone (or text if you must) and make PLANS to meet. For example...

HIM - "Hey (Kim) it is (Prince Charming) from match. Does Tuesday night work for you to meet for coffee at Starbucks on Smith Street around 7?"

ME - "Hey (Prince Charming) yes that works great. Looking forward to it"

Plans are made, great! Please don't text everyday until then. I do not know you and would like to get to know you IN PERSON. I am not looking for a pen pal.

Obviously afterward if things go well and you continue to get to know each other texting is in the safe zone.

The following example is just a little too pushy for a first time text... just my opinion though.

After specifically saying "Here is my cell, contact me when you would like to schedule a time to get together." This happened: 

Are you kidding me? We have not even met yet. You are not allowed to flirt with me... Or try to. 

The conversation ended there. 

I mean really, "hot" what are you 16?

Also it was clear that this online dater confused two people. Nowhere in my profile did it say NYC. Get your facts before you act... or text in this case.


Some people argue that a young gal' like myself shouldn't rush my single years away. Understandable, but everyone feels differently.

I am in no way trying to rush my life away. I just figured I would share this to hopefully make this process a little easier for the newbie online daters (and hopefully give you all a laugh). I think I have had a fair amount of experience where I can put in my two cents. Maybe I should start being paid for putting up with some of these online offenses for as long as I have. :)